Weird Al Yankovic Lyrics

7. Confessions Part III

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These are my confessions 
Just when I thought I said all I could say I came up up with more secrets to tell you today 
These are my confessions 
Slip my mind the last two times 
Silly me, so now I gotta give you part three of my confessions 
First I told you about the skank that I was cheating with,then I mentioned she's having my kid 
That's not all, now I recall more you see, so I'll give you part three of my confessions 

Now this is gonna be the hardest thing I ever had to do, 
Gonna tell you everything I left out of parts one and two 
Like remember when I told you I knew Paulie Shore (Paulie Shore) 
That's a lie, I don't know what I said that for 
I borrowed your chapstick (from you) 
I tried out your nose hair trimmer (too) 
And by the way your diamond ring is cubic circonium, 
I killed your goldfish accidently, just replaced it with another one 

These are my confessions 
Just when I thought I said all I could say I needed to get some things off my chest right away 
These are my confessions 
Slipped my mind the last two times, silly me, I guess I gotta give you part three of my confessions 
I threw up on your dog last time I had too much to drink 
There have been times when I've peed in your sink 
Don't know why, but you and I should agree that belongs in part three of my confessions 

Baby forgive me I'm still trying to figure out why I used your toothbrush to clean off the bathroom grought 
Oh and sometimes in private, I really like to dress up as Shirley Temple and spank myself with a hockey stick (hockey stick) 
My boss thinks I'm a jerk, I didn't get that raise. 
I haven't changed my underwear in twenty-seven days! 
And when I'm kissing you I fantasize you as a midget 
I'm so sorry Debbi! I mean Bridget! 

These are my confessions 
Just when I thought I said all I could say I got a few more secrets I'd like to convey 
These are my confessions 
Slipped my mind the last two times, silly me, I guess I gotta give you part three of my confessions 
Gave you buttered toast I dropped and then picked up off the floor 
FYI it was not a cold sore 
Ooops my bad, but you'll be madder at me when I finish part three of my confessions 

You don't know how hard it is for me to tell you this, but remember that shirt that you got me for my birthday? 
Well, I returned it for store credit. That thing was hideous, what were you thinking? 
O and by the way, I wasn't really sick last week, 
I just didn't wanna go to your stupid office picnic 
Oh and when I told you at breakfast we were all out of rice krispies, 
What I meant was that there was only enough left for me. Sorry. 

These are my confessions 
Just when I thought I said all I could say, I thought of some more things that should scare you away 
These are my confessions 
Slipped my mind the last two times, silly me, I guess I gotta give you part three of my confessions 
Once I blew my nose and wiped it on your cat 
And I lied, yes that dress makes you look fat 
Anyway, I shouldn't say anymore 'til I give you part four of my confessions

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